A Peaceful Warrior's Transformative Power of Loss
- Nov 10
- 3 min read
By Jonelle Colabufalo
There are a lot of things in my life I can’t control, but my approach is not one of them. People describe me as a "peaceful warrior," and while I don’t always feel that calm on the inside, that’s how I choose to present myself to the world. It’s a philosophy born from a life with its share of challenges and heartbreaks, but it’s a mindset that has enabled me to turn profound loss into a powerful force for good.
Some moments shatter your world and change the course of your life forever. For me, that moment happened twice, both times tied to my brother, Jared. The first was when he was a boy, a victim of a pedestrian accident that left him with life-changing injuries. But Jared was never one to be defined by his trauma. He was a beacon of light, a living example of strength who taught our family not to sweat the small stuff. He took his pain and used it to inspire others, sharing his story with high school students to promote road safety. This was his first legacy to me - a quiet courage, a testament to the power of a peaceful warrior.
Then, in 2013, the unthinkable happened. Jared was tragically killed in a cycling accident, and his second legacy began. The grief was all-consuming. That deep, gut-wrenching pain was something I didn't know how to carry.
But as the one who had always held things together for the family, I picked up the baton. I had to, for him and for us. It was his passing that truly crystallised my purpose. The raw despair transformed into a burning drive to make every moment count for others.
On the first anniversary of his death, we organised a charity walk in his memory. We just wanted to honour his legacy, maybe raise a little money for a life-saving surgery for a child. We had no idea it would become an annual event, a movement, a way to connect people and build community. It evolved from a day of solemn remembrance into our 'Walk to Remember,' a powerful and emotional event that brings hundreds of people together. We made a conscious effort to ensure it was a day of joy and connection, with music, food, and activities, because we wanted people to feel good about giving. It's a day of healing, a space where shared grief and connection replace loneliness and sorrow.
This taught me that true impact isn't just about money raised; it’s about human connection and the impact that creates a positive ripple effect in the community. The Jared Dunscombe Foundation was founded using a model where we don't just ask for donations; we invite people to be part of a bigger picture. Now we partner with existing community groups that need a specific project funded or supported by volunteers. People aren't just giving money; they're becoming part of a tangible story with a clear, positive ending. Jared’s legacy, and the foundation we founded in his name, has now funded a Sibling Support Role for The Compassionate Friends Victoria, addressed a critical gap in grief support for young adults, and helped establish the Victorian programs for Feel the Magic, providing crucial support for bereaved children and teens. We've even funded life-changing surgeries for children overseas. Every contribution has a clear, visible outcome.
I've also taken on Jared's role in the Teenagers' Road Accident Group. Now, I stand in front of year 12 students, sharing our family’s experience alongside police and emergency services. It's a raw, emotional story, but it’s one that creates a powerful connection with those young people, a connection that I believe is helping to save lives.
My life, and the foundation's work, show us that there is so much power in turning pain into purpose. It hasn’t been easy, but it’s been meaningful. I’m now the peaceful warrior, a leader who strives for calm and purpose, even when the world feels chaotic. I believe in the power of authenticity and connection to drive meaningful change, and I hope my story inspires you to overcome your own struggles to find your own sense of fulfilment by doing good.
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