Art of the Renewal
- 4 days ago
- 3 min read
By Melva LaJoy Legrand
My mother Joyce once said to me, “Melva LaJoy, the past has passed, and knowing that is the first step.” In my experience, the art of renewal can feel like a personal mammoth for these reasons:
We are comfortable with the known. It is where we believe we are valued, because to date, we hold on tightly to the wins of our current reality.
We are uncomfortable with change because it may ask more of us, and we are unsure we are ready. In these moments, we forget that life is a book and we are meant to create new chapters because every day in life is preparing for the next plot twist.
We allow our unresolved disappointments to prevent us from seeing any other possibility. When we work while carrying our disappointments, we mislabel them as “This is why I am strong,” rather than the truth, which can be: “This is why I no longer dream,” and the big one: “This is why I can’t try again.”
We share with someone in our circle our potential new beginning and are met with skepticism. This usually sounds like: Are you sure? Have you considered all the options?” When you hear some version of this advice, especially from someone close to you, it is hard to reconcile that this advice has no meaning. What is probably true is that this person is also comfortable with you in the version they know. If you embrace something new, they would have to consider where they fit in and begin a renewal journey they are not ready for.
And when these things are true, starting a new chapter starts to feel impossible because we have not positioned ourselves to believe that we deserve more. Comfortability becomes a cage.
In order to embrace new beginnings, I think you need to do one thing: Dream. I mean this sincerely; let your mind run wild and explore these questions:
Who do I want to be in this new chapter of my life? How do I want to feel? Who do I want to be around? And, equally important, what do I no longer want in my life? With this framework, you will be equipped to embrace your new endeavor with curiosity.
What is the worst that can happen? Often, we talk ourselves out of a good idea because we have decided—based on past experiences, poor advice, or just plain old fear—that our good idea isn’t great enough.
But what if great was not the standard? What if you approached renewal without seeking another award on your tour of “My Perfect Life,” which does not exist, by the way. Rather, what if you embrace that the worst is not a final stop, but rather an opportunity for discovery, learning, and clarifying who you want to become. That mindset shift will allow you to embrace a new beginning without attaching it to your overall worth.
When you take these steps, I believe you will begin to look at your past as a wise advisor; your experiences have led you to discoveries. Your disappointments have sharpened your discernment, and your successes have reminded you why life’s journey in itself is a form of art.
What I believe is that you are your most important resource, and also, you are your longest relationship, which is why, just like a performance review, you deserve to do a purpose or passion review; you deserve multiple moments of renewal because living is the art, and ultimately, you can be in full control of your masterpiece.
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