Become Your Own Cheerleader
- Oct 7
- 3 min read
By Manoosh Majdzadeh
Not all challenges in our careers are pivotal events or moments. Sometimes it’s the gradual realization that the motivation you need just isn’t there. And when that happens, you have to learn to create it yourself.
And that’s a hell of a painful process, but believe me, it’s worth it.
Environments are rarely fair. Some leaders avoid hard conversations, or worse, they might just sweep them under the rug, hoping that they’d resolve themselves. Some decisions don’t make sense. There isn’t always clarity for everyone.
Years ago, I had moments where I really felt stuck and helpless. Open communication, empathy, and validation weren’t my team lead’s strongest suit. The team dynamics weren’t always easy, and not every decision made sense to me. I tried to address it. I spoke up, honestly and directly, because that’s how I believe problems get solved.
Instead, I was met with resistance and even got labeled for it.
That was frustrating, but it also made me realize something: I couldn’t wait for external motivation. I couldn’t wait for the system to hand me clarity. If I wanted to keep growing, I had to create it myself, and I had to push hard for it.
And among all of this, you should be brutally honest with yourself. Am I being fair? Am I being objective? Where do I fall at fault?
At first, I struggled. I reached out, I communicated openly, and I tried to fix things. But what I eventually learned was that I couldn’t always control the environment. What I could control was how I showed up.
So I just stopped waiting for someone else to fuel my motivation. I threw myself into learning — constantly, relentlessly. New skills, different ways of working, new perspectives, and even new challenges.
I also got more certain about how I wanted to lead and collaborate. Even if I couldn’t always receive open communication, I could model it. Even if I didn’t always feel supported, I could support others.
Did that help make me a better leader? I think so.
I became very intentional about protecting my team’s time, their focus, and their mental health, while being generous with what I knew. I wanted to create the kind of environment I wished I had: Clarity all the way from the top to the bottom. Being there when things get difficult, and supporting the team even when they fuck up.
That shift changed everything. Instead of feeling powerless, I found resilience. Instead of waiting for external motivation, I built persistence. I discovered that growth isn’t about moving in perfect conditions, it’s about learning how to keep going when the conditions aren’t perfect at all.
Looking back, those difficult seasons have shaped me more than any other success could have. They taught me that resilience isn’t glamorous; it’s often quiet, daily, and lonely. But it builds a kind of strength you carry with you everywhere.
So if you’re a woman working in tech, don’t underestimate your own ability to self-motivate. Yes, it’s easier when you’re surrounded by support and recognition, but your growth doesn’t have to stop when those things are missing. You can still choose to learn, to persist, to show up fully. And one day, you’ll look back and realize those moments built the strongest version of you.
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