Intentional Healing with Breathwork
- Apr 7
- 3 min read
By Keegan Read
Emotional strength is not, “pulling up your boot straps” or “being quiet to keep the peace”, I’d argue that those are in fact emotional weaknesses. Emotional strength is about being able to have Life hit you hard, and being able to express what feelings come up without feeling the need to change or adjust your feelings to make those around you feel comfortable. We spend so much of our time worrying about how others around us will feel or react to the “real us”, or how we really feel about…. Anything really. Being tied to others emotional responses leads us to curtail our own needs and desires, that really undermines authentic living. If we aren’t authentic with ourselves, with our emotions, then we tell ourselves the same story that got many of us hurt, drove us to addiction, or worse; we aren’t good enough, we don’t deserve it, etc. I say this with personal experience, with years of trying to watch what I feel, how I express it, and a lot of the time, shaming myself for simply having emotions. Being able to actually feel emotions can suck at times, but it’s better than living in a bottle trying to escape the shame of existing.
Boundaries are crucial when it comes to protecting one’s mental health, and I cannot express how much they will save you when you are at a low spot as well. Boundaries are not set to keep people out, but rather, how they should treat you when they are in your space, much like when a guest is staying at a hotel. There are rules to follow within the building, and doing so allows one to have a great experience while resting during a long journey, yet to not follow those boundaries can result in being kicked out or owing money after the stay is finished. Without boundaries, we tell others that we are open to whatever the world may send our way and that we are willingly accepting it, and that we will handle it accordingly. Not having boundaries, or compromising them because of certain people or situations, has landed me in hot water every single time. My boundaries are there to protect me, which enables me to interact with the world on my own terms, giving me power over what I do in my day to day activities.
Regulating stress is what we all seem to strive for at the end of the day, but many of us tend to run to a vice for a sense of relief, even if it’s temporary. So long as we practice setting and following our boundaries, our emotional strength is charged, which helps regulate stress in a way that is healthy and not detrimental to our well-being in the long run. We can look at breathing exercises to help in the moment for a quick stress relief. Many of us think that smokers are getting something from their nicotine, but I can tell you first hand that the peace of mind they seem to get is from breathing a little differently for a small period of time which allows one's brain to really relax a little, refocus, and de-stress the moment. Box breathing is taught in the military, so why can’t we learn something that helps soldiers in combat? We are worth every breath we take, and we tend to rush through life holding our breath as if we are under water. It’s time to breathe, set boundaries, and express your true emotions, at least with yourself. The rest will follow once you settle yourself.
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