Sandra Myers, President & Co-founder, Select Date Society

As a high-end matchmaker and relationship expert, can you tell us about your background and what led you to found Select Date Society?

As the President and Co-Founder of Select Date Society, my journey into high-end matchmaking was born from both personal passion and professional purpose. Prior to founding SDS, I spent years working closely with high-achieving professionals—individuals who excelled in every area of life except their relationships. I recognized a common thread: they didn't have time to date inefficiently, nor were they interested in swiping through endless profiles or settling for surface-level connections.

What truly sparked the creation of Select Date Society, however, was a pivotal life event involving my business partner, Amber Lee. After surviving a sudden cardiac arrest, Amber was inspired to focus only on meaningful work, and that meant creating a service that helped people find deep, lasting love. Together, we decided to build something different: a boutique, concierge-style matchmaking firm that combines elite relationship advisement with strategic introductions tailored for successful, discerning clients.

We founded Select Date Society to serve those who are serious about finding love and who value the same level of excellence and discretion in their personal lives as they do in their professional lives.

What unique challenges and rewards have you encountered in building a luxury matchmaking service?

Building a luxury matchmaking service like Select Date Society has been both incredibly rewarding and uniquely challenging. One of the biggest challenges has been redefining perceptions. Many people still associate matchmaking with outdated stereotypes, or they compare it to app-based dating, which couldn't be further from what we offer. Educating our audience on what true, high-end matchmaking looks like and why it's worth the investment requires constant refinement in messaging, branding, and client experience.

Another challenge is maintaining the highest level of discretion and personalization. Our clients are often high-profile individuals, including C-suite executives, celebrities, and ultra-successful entrepreneurs. Therefore, protecting their privacy while delivering a deeply personal service is non-negotiable. It means every step of our process must be curated, confidential, and deeply human.

On the other hand, the rewards are profound. There's nothing more fulfilling than knowing you helped change someone's life, not just by introducing them to a partner, but by advising them to become the best version of themselves in the process. We're not just facilitating dates; we're creating love stories that would have never happened otherwise. Watching those moments unfold and being trusted with something as intimate and meaningful as someone's future is an honor we don't take lightly.

Can you share a memorable success story from your matchmaking career that illustrates the impact of your work?

Absolutely! One of the most memorable success stories that stands out involved a client who had achieved extraordinary success professionally. She ran a global company, traveled constantly, and was admired in her industry; however, privately, she felt isolated. She came to us not just looking for a partner, but for someone who truly saw her beyond the titles and accomplishments.

Through our highly personalized process, we introduced her to a man who was equally accomplished, yet incredibly grounded. Their first conversation lasted over four hours. What struck me wasn't just the immediate chemistry, but how deeply aligned they were in their values, vision, and emotional intelligence. Within a year, they were engaged, and today, they often credit our team for changing the entire trajectory of their lives.

That's the impact of our work. We're not just introducing people; we're helping them write the next chapter of their lives with intention, clarity, and connection. It's a privilege to play even a small role in something so life-defining.

How do you approach the delicate balance between maintaining client privacy and showcasing your expertise in the public eye?

Balancing client privacy with public visibility is one of the most critical and nuanced aspects of leading a luxury matchmaking firm like Select Date Society. Our clients come to us not only for results but for discretion. Many are public figures, high-level executives, or individuals with reputations to protect, and they trust us with a highly personal aspect of their lives.

That's why we've built our entire process around confidentiality. We never disclose client identities, and every introduction and communication is handled with the utmost care. At the same time, we understand the importance of thought leadership. Showcasing our expertise publicly, whether through media appearances, speaking engagements, or published articles, is how we elevate the industry standard and connect with those who truly value what we offer.

So, we focus on sharing insights, not identities. We speak to the psychology of modern relationships, the unique challenges faced by successful singles, and the proven strategies that lead to lasting love. In doing so, we remain a trusted resource while fiercely protecting our clients' privacy, because trust is the cornerstone of everything we do.

In your experience, what's the most common misconception about high-end matchmaking, and how do you address it with potential clients?

One of the most common misconceptions about high-end matchmaking is that it's simply a more expensive version of dating apps, or that people who use a matchmaker must be "desperate." That couldn't be further from the truth. Our clients are among the most successful, self-aware, and discerning individuals you'll ever meet. They don't struggle to meet people; they struggle to meet the right people. They value their time, understand the importance of compatibility beyond surface-level attraction, and prefer a curated, strategic approach to finding love, just as they do in other areas of life.

When we speak with potential clients, we help reframe matchmaking as an elite, concierge-level service, on par with hiring a private wealth advisor or executive coach. It's not about outsourcing their love life; it's about investing in it with intention. Once they understand that we combine psychology, relationship coaching, and highly personalized introductions, they begin to see matchmaking not as a last resort, but as a smart, elevated choice.

How has the landscape of luxury matchmaking evolved since you started, and how have you adapted your services to meet changing client needs?

The luxury matchmaking landscape has undergone significant evolution since the launch of Select Date Society. Early on, many clients came to us seeking a more discreet and refined alternative to online dating, something that respected their time, privacy, and lifestyle. While that's still true, today's clients are more self-aware and emotionally intelligent than ever before. They're not just looking for a partner; they're looking for alignment in values, lifestyle, and long-term goals.

We've adapted by expanding our services beyond introductions. Relationship coaching, personal development, and strategic support now play a central role in our process. Today's discerning clients want more than a date; they want clarity, insight, and a trusted advisor in their corner. That's why Select Date Society has become such a powerful resource for the elite. Our proprietary approach to matchmaking allows us to work closely with individuals on a deeper level, helping them prepare for the right relationship before it ever begins.

We've also leaned into technology in a way that supports, rather than replaces, the human touch. While we don't rely on algorithms, we do use digital tools to streamline behind-the-scenes efforts, allowing us to spend more time on what matters: understanding each client as a whole person.

Ultimately, our success has stemmed from staying grounded in our core values—discretion, excellence, and authenticity—while continually evolving to meet the emotional and logistical needs of modern, high-performing singles.

Can you describe a particularly challenging match you've made and the lessons you learned from that experience?

One particularly challenging match involved two clients who, on paper, appeared to be a perfect fit. They shared similar lifestyles, values, and long-term goals. However, emotionally, they were in very different places. One client was fully ready for a committed relationship, while the other, unbeknownst to us, was still processing a recent breakup and hadn't done the necessary internal work.

Their initial introduction went well, and there was genuine interest, but the connection quickly lost momentum. It served as a powerful reminder that timing and emotional readiness are just as critical as compatibility. You simply can't fast-track personal growth.

The experience taught us two key lessons.

First, never underestimate the importance of thorough pre-match vetting, including asking the difficult and often uncomfortable questions that reveal where someone truly stands emotionally. Second, even the most carefully curated match can't substitute for internal alignment.

As a result, we've strengthened our vetting process to ensure our clients are only introduced to individuals who are genuinely ready and emotionally available. It's not just about compatibility; it's about protecting our clients' time, energy, and heart. Every introduction we make is intentional, so our clients can move forward with confidence, knowing they're meeting someone who is truly prepared for a meaningful relationship.

What advice would you give to singles in the high-net-worth world who are hesitant about using a matchmaking service?

My advice to high-net-worth singles who are hesitant about using a matchmaking service is this: don't confuse privacy with isolation, or independence with having to do everything alone. You've likely built your success by surrounding yourself with experts, whether it's financial advisors, attorneys, or executive teams, because you understand the value of time, strategy, and results. Your personal life deserves that same level of care and intention. Matchmaking isn't about outsourcing love; it's about aligning yourself with a partner who matches your values, lifestyle, and long-term vision.

At Select Date Society, we offer a curated, discreet, and highly personalized experience. You're not being placed into a database or handed a list of random names. Every introduction is thoughtful, intentional, and tailored to your unique standards and goals.

If you've reached a point where you want more than surface-level dating, and you're ready to approach your love life with the same intention and excellence that you bring to every other area of your life, then matchmaking may be the smartest investment you can make.

Looking ahead, what innovations or trends do you foresee in the luxury matchmaking industry, and how is Select Date Society preparing for the future?

Looking ahead, the luxury matchmaking industry is evolving toward an even more holistic and personalized approach. While technology will remain an important tool, the future lies in combining advanced innovations with deeply human, bespoke service. Today's clients seek matchmaking that not only connects them with compatible partners but also supports their personal growth, emotional intelligence, and overall relationship readiness.

At Select Date Society, we're preparing for this future by expanding beyond traditional matchmaking. Our "Founders Club" exemplifies this approach, offering one client at a time direct, hands-on work with the Founders themselves. This member is treated as our exclusive priority, receiving no hand-offs or involvement from assistants. We build genuine alliances by meeting with their friends and family, even visiting their homes, to fast-track their journey toward meaningful love.

In parallel, we're investing in secure, intelligent technology to streamline our internal processes, enhancing efficiency without compromising the warmth, discretion, and personalized care our clients expect.

We work equally with both successful men and women, selecting clients based solely on our confidence in their success to find meaningful relationships. Our commitment is to provide an ultra-high-touch, curated experience that delivers exceptional results.

The future of luxury matchmaking is deeply personalized, emotionally intelligent, and seamlessly integrated, and we are proud to lead this transformation.

Connect With Sandra

www.linkedin.com/company/select-date-society