Writing as an Act of Survival and Gratitude

Nov 21
3 min read

By Lisa Sugarman

Author, Mental Health Advocate, 3x Suicide Loss Survivor

I didn’t start writing about my lived experience as a three-time survivor of suicide loss because I wanted to become an author. I started writing about my trauma because my survival depended on it. And I knew other people must feel the same.

As a multiple survivor of so many suicides, including my own father, grief didn’t just touch my life, it blew it apart. It left me inside my own thought loops, replaying stories I didn’t know how to share out loud and feeling alone. And in that isolation, I learned that what I needed was community. And if that’s what I needed, then I was sure others must too.

It wasn’t until I finally began writing about my father’s death—learning thirty-five years after the fact that he died by suicide—that something in me shifted. Sharing this nuanced brand of loss with other people made me feel less alone in my grief because it fleshed out the reality that I wasn’t the only one carrying it. Because it was through that sharing that I discovered what I now believe is the highest purpose of storytelling: creating connection.

That’s when writing became my proving ground, where I learned that gratitude and grief can live in the same sentence without canceling each other out.

And that it was a beacon for others to recognize the same.

By writing with intention about my own grief, I discovered I can be heartbroken by my losses and still deeply grateful for the way those losses have turned so much of my pain into purpose.

Once I started storytelling, everything changed.

Sharing my lived experience gave other around me permission to do the same and opened the door to the work I do today. It led me to become a crisis counselor with The Trevor Project, volunteering on their Crisis & Suicide Lifeline and taking calls from at-risk LGBTQ+ youth in crisis. It inspired me to create The Survivors, a mental health podcast centered on building a safe space to talk honestly about surviving suicide and all types of trauma. It’s what pushed me to found The HelpHUB™, a mental health resources platform dedicated to connecting people with the tools, content, and support they need most. And it’s what shaped my upcoming book, Surviving: Finding Hope After Suicide Loss—a comprehensive memoir, field guide, and toolkit for those trying to understand and heal after losing someone they love to suicide. Storytelling gave me back my agency, it’s as simple and as profound as that. And it’s moved me from silence into purpose.

Because there’s something powerful that happens when we choose to share our story with intention. When the goal isn’t just to tell a story but to offer our lived experience as a pathway to healing, our words can become a lifeline for someone who’s struggling.

Purposeful storytelling is about sharing a message that has a positive impact on the community you want to serve. It’s about turning our individual pain into collective healing.

So, I write to honor the people I’ve lost. I write to thank the version of myself who turned such deep pain into a mission. And I write in the hope that someone, somewhere, will see themselves in my story and find just enough in it to keep going.

That’s the impact of sharing with purpose. And I’m grateful every day that I found the courage to give my story a voice.

About Lisa Sugarman

Lisa Sugarman is a three-time suicide loss survivor, author, and leading mental health advocate. She’s a crisis counselor with The Trevor Project and a storyteller with NAMI, using her lived experience to help others heal through connection and community.

She’s also the Founder of The HelpHUB™, a free online platform offering inclusive mental health resources, crisis support, tools, and treatment options for every community. Lisa hosts The Survivors Podcast and is the author of Surviving: Finding Hope After Suicide Loss (2026) and three previous books on parenting and embracing our perfectly imperfectness.

A Safe Place suicide loss support group facilitator and board member with Samaritans Southcoast, Lisa’s work has been featured on the Mental Health Television Network and on platforms like Calmerry, Recovery.com, Healthline Parenthood, Grown & Flown, TODAY Parents, The Washington Post, and Psychology Today. She lives and writes just north of Boston.