Beyond Words
- Sep 17
- 3 min read
By Paula C Lamb
There’s a well-known quote by Epictetus: “We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.” And Stephen Covey adds: “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” That used to be me. And to be honest, sometimes it still is. I’ll catch myself interrupting, eager to get my point across, only to realize I’ve trampled over someone’s thoughts. These days, I’m quicker to stop, apologize, and give space for the other person to finish. But this awareness didn’t come naturally—it was the result of a humbling experience.
It was a warm summer day in 2009. I was sitting at a café, latte in hand, across from a life coach I’d met at a networking event. We were exploring ways to collaborate. He shared generously about his work and experiences, and I—true to form—kept jumping in. Mid-conversation, he paused, looked at me, and said bluntly, “Has anyone ever told you that you interrupt a lot? You might want to consider listening more and speaking less.”
I was stunned. It felt like a slap in the face. My cheeks burned, and I was mortified.
But that moment taught me something powerful:
When we truly listen—without interrupting—we’re saying: “What you’re sharing matters.”
That deep listening builds trust, understanding, and connection.
And that everyone deserves to feel heard, seen, and respected.
Listening is not just a polite gesture it’s a foundational part of effective communication, both in our personal lives and in business. Here’s why listening more and speaking less is so important:
1. It Reduces Miscommunication
Communication isn’t just about expressing ourselves it’s about receiving and interpreting messages accurately. If we constantly interrupt, we create confusion, miss points, and make unnecessary assumptions. Attentive listening allows for greater clarity therefore meaningful conversations.
2. It Encourages Mutual Exchange
When we step back and allow space for others to speak, we promote a balanced, two-way dialogue. This is essential for healthy relationships and effective teamwork. People are more open when they know they won’t be talked over.
3. It Deepens Understanding Through Nonverbal Cues
A good listener notices tone, facial expressions, and body language—elements that are often more telling than words. By paying attention to these non verbal communication cues, we respond more appropriately and empathetically.
4. It Enhances Leadership and Credibility
Great leaders are great listeners. When we make a habit of listening more, we’re seen as thoughtful, wise, and trustworthy. People are more likely to seek our input and respect our perspective. In business, this increases influence and strengthens leadership presence.
In a world filled with overwhelming noise, learning to quiet our own voice and truly hear others is a skill worth cultivating. It’s not always easy especially for those of us with quick minds and faster tongues but it’s essential. To listen more and speak less is another puzzle piece to becoming unstoppable.
So next time you find yourself rushing to reply — pause. Let the other person finish. Listen not just with your ears, but with intention. Because beyond words, that’s where real connection comes alive. #yougotthis
Hello, I’m Paula Lamb, a regular contributor to HANNA Magazine. Through my articles and two co-authored anthologies—She Glows: Empowering Women Through Wellness and Self-Care and She Stands Strong: 30 Personal Stories of Strength and Resilience—I share powerful insights on building a life you love, moving beyond what holds you back, and taking the leap of faith despite fear and doubt. If you'd like to learn more, I invite you to connect with me.
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