Rising Through the Cracks: How Gratitude and Healing Shape the Way We Win
- 5 days ago
- 4 min read
By Hannah Darby, GMBPsS, SMACCPH
Every December, as one year fades and another begins, we’re invited to reflect—not only on what we’ve achieved, but on who we’ve become. For many women, that reflection carries both triumph and tenderness. It’s the recognition that our strength was forged in moments the world never saw.
For me, resilience was born not from perfection but from pain. I know what it’s like to rebuild from grief, to feel the weight of invisible wounds, and to wonder if light will ever find you again. And yet, it’s in those cracks that the gold of growth appears.
My journey through loss, trauma, and chronic illness became the foundation of my life’s work—helping others heal and rediscover hope through Healing with Hannah, my trauma-informed therapy and coaching practice. I created my signature Kintsugi Programme and H.E.A.L.™ Method to remind people that their brokenness isn’t the end of their story—it’s where transformation begins.
The Art of Kintsugi: Turning Broken Pieces into Purpose
The ancient Japanese art of Kintsugi teaches that when a piece of pottery breaks, it is repaired with gold—honoring its history rather than hiding it. The repaired piece becomes stronger and more beautiful because of its cracks.
That philosophy sits at the heart of my work. In the same way Kintsugi transforms pottery, we can transform ourselves by integrating the lessons of our past into the person we’re becoming. The healing process is not about erasing scars; it’s about learning to see them as part of our design.
When women embrace this perspective, we begin to lead differently. We stop striving for flawlessness and start leading from authenticity. That shift—from “fixing” ourselves to honoring ourselves—is where genuine power is born.
H.E.A.L.™: A Framework for the Heart
Over time, I developed a simple yet powerful framework for emotional healing—what I call the H.E.A.L.™ Method:
H – Heal your relational wounds
Understanding how past relationships—especially early ones—shape how we see ourselves and others.
E – Express anger and pain
Giving ourselves permission to feel without judgment.
A – Accept your new reality
Acknowledging that life has changed and allowing space for that truth.
L – Learn to live and love again
Reconnecting with joy, love, and gratitude as we move forward.
H.E.A.L.™ is more than an acronym—it’s a roadmap for resilience. It honors both the psychology of recovery and the spirituality of self-compassion. Healing happens when science and soul meet.
Leadership That Begins Within
In my experience, the most impactful leaders are those who have done their inner work. They’ve faced their fears, held space for their emotions, and learned that vulnerability is not weakness—it’s wisdom.
I call this heart-led leadership. It’s the kind of leadership that listens first, that uplifts others without losing self-boundaries, and that measures success not only in outcomes but in how people feel when they’re around us.
When gratitude guides leadership, burnout fades and balance returns. Gratitude reminds us that every challenge is an invitation to grow, every setback a chance to realign with purpose.
As women driving change, whether in boardrooms or homes, we lead best when we lead from love—not depletion.
The Role of Gratitude in Healing and Success
Gratitude saved me long before I ever taught it. In seasons of grief, I started listing one small thing each day that made me smile—a warm cup of tea, my cat’s quiet purr, a message from a friend. Those tiny acknowledgments slowly rewired my mind toward hope.
Science now confirms what many of us intuitively know: gratitude activates the brain’s reward center, increases serotonin, and strengthens resilience. But beyond science, gratitude is deeply spiritual—it brings us back to presence. It’s the pause that reminds us, “I’m still here. I’m still growing.”
As the year closes, I encourage you to make gratitude your grounding force. Not because everything went right, but because you kept going when it didn’t.
The Strength of Softness
For so long, women were told that leadership meant being hard, loud, and endlessly strong. I disagree. True strength often shows up as softness—empathy, intuition, the ability to nurture ourselves as fiercely as we nurture others.
Softness doesn’t mean surrender. It means leading with emotional intelligence and courage. It’s in the softness that innovation, connection, and creativity flourish. When we allow ourselves to be human—to cry, to rest, to feel—we lead from authenticity rather than armor.
This is why I believe the future of women’s leadership lies in emotional awareness. When we embrace gratitude, compassion, and boundaries, we create cultures that thrive—not just survive.
Lessons from the Journey
Every woman’s story holds power. Mine began in grief and grew into gratitude, but each chapter has taught me something vital:
You don’t have to be unbreakable to be strong.
The willingness to mend is stronger than the illusion of perfection.
Gratitude transforms survival into growth.
When you focus on what’s left instead of what’s lost, healing begins.
Your story is your strength.
The parts you’re afraid to share are often what someone else needs to hear.
As 2025 comes to a close, reflect not only on what you accomplished, but on what you overcame. The quiet battles you fought and won matter just as much as the visible victories.
A Message to Every Woman Reading This
You are not behind. You are not broken. You are becoming.
Every setback this year has been shaping your comeback. Every tear, every late-night doubt, every brave decision—it’s all preparing you for what’s next.
Take a moment to thank yourself for surviving. Then, thank the women who’ve stood beside you—the friends, the mentors, the sisters who reminded you of your worth. This is what She Wins means to me: women rising together, not in competition, but in gratitude and grace.
You don’t have to have it all figured out to be a winner. You just have to keep showing up—with heart.
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