by Jeanna Crawford
People are tribal. Because of that, being accepted is still part of our internal wiring. In our ancient mind, it’s critical for survival. One way we have adapted is to give gifts. Oh, do we love to give gifts!
We give at Christmas, birthdays, anniversaries, special occasions, holidays and for no reason at all. Sometimes, we’ll even get a little something for ourselves. There’s nothing wrong with that by the way.
We stress over gifts. We search for hours on end for the perfect gift. We anticipate the receipt of the gift. We put a lot into the act of giving a gift. Some gifts are expensive, some are not, some are sentimental, some are homemade.
But what’s the best gift to give and to get? It’s not material, I can tell you that. The best gift that you can give or receive is twofold, time and attention. Obviously, this is given to those nearest and dearest to us because it’s a hefty withdrawal from the bank of us. It’s part of our being, something we give selflessly because we cannot get it back nor can it be exchanged. Perhaps that’s why we spend more time buying “stuff” than giving this precious gift.
What keeps us from giving this gift? For starters, there’s only so many hours in the day. We are busy folks these days. Another reason we don’t give of ourselves like we may want to is because we don’t have the energy. Maybe we’re fighting for our health and there’s nothing left to give at the end of the day. Or because of that battle we can’t plan on when the good days will take place or when we’ll be able to give that kind of energy.
What if we gave ourselves a gift first so that we can give to others what would mean so much? What if we took the time to assess what’s really draining our precious energy resources, fix those drains so that we are our fullest, most present selves? What does that even look like?
You know on airplanes when the flight attendants give you the safety instructions and talk about the oxygen mask? What do they tell us to do first? Put your mask on first, then assist others. Why is that? You can’t give what you don’t have. If you can’t breathe you can’t help another person get the oxygen that they need. You won’t know until it’s too late, so you need to address your needs first. This may sound selfish but it’s not. Isn’t our health the same?
If we don’t nourish our bodies, we won’t have the energy that we need to take care of ourselves, much less others.
If we don’t utilize good nutrition, our immune system falls short, and we get sick.
If we don’t have an outlet for stress, how can we clear our minds to be present for others?
If we don’t keep our bodies moving how can get play with our younger generations and get to know them? Or get out and visit with friends and loved ones?
If we don’t monitor our health, how can we prevent disease that will remove us from our loved ones too soon?
Ladies, we nurture to a fault. In our attempt to love and help we neglect ourselves. Sometimes that may be necessary. I want to tell you today that YOU are the perfect gift! YOU are worth spending time, energy and money on, for your needs and your health. Take care of YOU, you can take care of them.
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